ORR, Francis William "Bill" September 30, 1942 - December 5, 2014

Bill passed away on Friday, December 5, 2014 after a courageous battle with cancer. He will be lovingly and sadly missed by his wife Sheila of 49 years and their three children Kim, Brad (Jennifer)and Kelly ( Danny) as well as his eight grandchildren, Dan, Andrew, Matthew, Clare, Conor, Allysha, Declan and Owen. Bill was predeceased by his parents; three sisters; one brother and his son-in-law Randy. At Bill's request there will be no Funeral Service held. Memorial donations may be made in Bill's name directly to a Charity of your choice. Messages of condolence may be forwarded to the family at www.piersons.ca. Arrangements in care of Pierson's Funeral Service. Telephone 403-235-3602.

A man full of spirit, a heart made of gold
A father full of patience, a husband to hold
A life full of laughter, we celebrate for you
And we'll embrace every teaching in all that we do

I will carry you always, in my rights and in my wrongs
In every achievement, and when the road gets too long
For father you've been there my whole life through
You taught me what love is...and oh, how we loved you

You are and always will be, my dad and my friend
And I say this with tear filled eyes; this is not the end
For I know you will be here with me, in my heart and in my ear
Telling me how proud you are with every passing year

 

So rest now in heaven, in a garden you call home
We'll hold you in our hearts Dad, and know we're not alone.

With love from your boys.

Our family has been going through some more tough times.  My dad, Bill Orr, has been diagnosed with cancer (Sept 25th) and was admitted to hospice Monday Oct 27th.  The cancer is all through his body and brain.  He is doing okay now but has lost the use of his left hand and is very unsteady while walking.  He has become forgetful and hard to care for at home so the hospice is the best place for him to get the care he needs and we can just be family around him.  It seems to be a fast growing cancer that the doctors were unable to help with Chemo or Radiation.

Please add us to your prayers as we go through this awful path again.

When I laid there beside you,
Could you feel me there?
My arms were wrapped around you,
And I was stroking your hair.

I was talking about all the good times,
For me they were every single day.
I wanted you to feel love and comfort,
And happy in some way.

I watched your every breath,
And prayed that each one wasn't your last.
The time we got to share together,
Went by too quick...Too fast.

I wanted you to wake up,
Please Honey...Open your eyes.
Tell me this is a nightmare,
And not our goodbyes.

As your last breath grew closer,
We lay there peacefully together.
My heart continually breaking,
Because I wanted you forever.

Then there it was,
Your final breath of air.
I didn't want to believe it,
This is so cruel and not fair.

I held your beautiful face,
And prayed you'd breath again.
I wasn't ready for you to go,
I couldn't admit that this was the end.

But then I realized that you were now in peace,
And not suffering anymore.
You were beginning the life of an Angel,
And your body would no longer be sore.

I held you close and squeezed you tight,
And tried to say goodbye.
I've lost my husband and my number one best friend,
All my heart could do is cry.

I slowly got up,
I wanted so much to stay.
I leaned over and gave you one more kiss,
It was so hard to walk away.

Randy you are my entire world,
And I miss you so very much.
I wish I could feel your loveable cuddle,
And your soft and gentle touch.

But for now I have to wait,
Until we meet again.
You will always be in my heart and thoughts,
My dear love and best friend.

Always and Forever,
Our hearts will always touch.
Always and Forever,
Your wife loves you so much.

We send you our love in these green balloons. 

Prayers for those who are in heaven. 

Love and miss you so much Randy. 

Kim, Dan, Andrew and Matthew

 

 

 

 

 

 Randy

 

your life was a blessing

 your memory a treasure...

 You are loved beyond words

 and missed beyond measure...

I sit alone now in the darkness of despair.
I cry my silent tears,
My heart is broken into a million tiny pieces.
The silence is deafening to my ears.
The darkness frightens me,
The shadows climb the wall.
I hear footsteps walking,
Passing through the hall.
The loneliness surrounds me,
It takes my breath away,
This is the pattern of my life,
Since that awful, dreadful day.
God called you home
To be with him
And took you away from me.
I walk, I talk. I carry on
When the sun pokes out it's head
But when darkness falls
And evening comes
I cannot go to bed.
For this is when I miss you most of all
When I curl into a little ball
And cry those silent tears.
Watching the shadows,
And missing you.

The time we had, Dad,
Wasn't nearly enough
To pack in an entire
Lifetime of love.

There are so many questions
That I need answers to,
But now that you're gone
There's no way to ask you.

But there are still photos
To remember you by,
Each time I look at them,
I still want to cry.

They say grief is easier
to bear as time goes by,
But the doesn't stop me
from wondering why?

Why my dear, sweet dad
Was taken so soon,
When he was my guiding star,
My sun and my moon.

There are no answers
To a question like this,
So I'll cherish your memory,
And mourn the years we'll miss.

 

 

 

 If tears could build a stairwell and memories were a lane, 

 

I would walk right up to Heaven and bring you home again. 

 

No farewell words were spoken no time to say good-bye .

 

You were gone before I knew it, and only God knows why. 

 

My heart still aches in sadness, and secret tears still flow.

 

What it means to lose you, no one will ever know.

Here are the funeral details:

Prayers:

Thursday May 15th, 2014  7:00 pm
Pierson's Funeral Home - Forest Lawn Chapel
 Phone: 403-235-3602
4121 - 17 Avenue S.E., Calgary, Alberta T2A 0T1

Funeral:

Friday May 16th, 2014 11:00 am
Holy Trinity Parish
1525-45th Street SE
Calgary, Alberta T2A 1N3 Canada
(403) 272-1258

Reception:

Friday May 16th, 2014  1:00 pm

EXECUTIVE ROYAL INN HOTEL
2828 - 23 Street NE
Calgary, AB T2E 8T4
Toll Free: 1-877-769-2562
Other Enquiries: (403) 291-2003

For anyone traveling from out of town The Executive Royal Inn Hotel has blocked rooms for us.  You can call the above numbers to reserve a room.  Availability of rooms starts on Thursday May 15, 2014

Our family is deeply saddened to inform you that Randy passed away on Saturday evening, ( May 10, 2014).  This ends his battle with cancer that started July 2013.  He was surrounded by the love of family and friends his final days. 



Funeral announcement to come.

Eternal rest grant unto Randy, O Lord,
and let perpetual light shine upon him.
May the souls of the faithful departed,
through the mercy of God, rest in peace.

Amen.

Quite a bit has happened since Monday.  When I went back on Tuesday morning Randy had taken a turn for the worse.  He had tried to do things by himself overnight and missed the edge of the bed and fell down.  Bruised his right side ribs and leg but otherwise ok.  He also was having trouble keeping anything down.  If he drank any water or when they gave him his meds through the tube he would throw up - so his pain spiked up because he was not getting his pain relief.  There was also blood coming up, which means there is some internal bleeding - most likely from the tumor.  They also decided to move Randy to a private room so that he could have a better space, more quiet, bigger area for family.  Moved him around 2 pm.  So much better.
I spent Tuesday night at the hospital with Randy.  He was able to finally get  some sleep.  Also giving him his pain relief meds through the sub q line helped him get the pain under control. They suspended giving him his Tinzaparin to see if it would slow down the bleeding.  It's a balancing act....blood clot prevention or slowing down the bleeding.  By end of day Wednesday there was little to no blood in his throw up. 

Randy and I  have made a heartbreaking and difficult decision to move him to a hospice rather than being able to coming home.   It would have been nice to have him at home but he is at the point where I would become fulltime caregiver and would lose the chance to be with him and not worry about everything.  He will have 24 hour care and that allows me, the boys and rest of family/friends to spend time with him as a wife/son/brother/mother/sister/friend without having to worry about the "care" side of things.  Gave them our top three choices so will have to wait and see where a bed becomes available.  He will be moved with in a day or two. 

Please pray that Randy's final journey is speedy and pain free as possible.  It's so very hard to let go but he is so tired and has had enough of this suffering.  He deserves to be free.  Has suffered enough. I came across this poem below.  I think it says it all:

It's Ok To Go

© Lori Daoust

                     

You were sick and tired and we all knew,
that God would soon come to take you.
You fought so hard, so very long,
but through the pain, you stayed strong.

We all knew there would come a day,
when God would come to carry you away.
It doesn’t make it easier to say goodbye,
and I try so hard not to cry.

I can’t help but feel defeated,
or even maybe a little cheated.
But how very selfish would I be,
to hope and pray you could stay with me.

So as you laid there tubes running to and fro,
I had to tell you "It's ok to go".
Say "Hi" to loved ones waiting on the other side.
I know some day; you'll be there when I take that ride.

Source: http://www.familyfriendpoems.com/poem/its-ok-to-go#ixzz318OqmsUx
Family Friend Poems

Today Randy was still very worn out.  Spent the day sleeping.  The doctor came and talked with us and are hoping to send him home tomorrow (Tuesday) fingers crossed.  His pain is still greatly diminished which is awesome, so the plexus block worked.  We were told it can last for up to 6 months for pain relief.  The dietitian was going to recommend some fiber be added to his formula for the tube feeds to try and add bulk. 

The physiotherapist came to see how Randy is set up at home and we are going to get a walker for him to use as support when he needs to walk.  I'll have to pick it up tomorrow.

We got a hospital bed set up for him at home so he can be more comfortable.  Had to re-arrange the furniture but it fits.  Nice and cozy for him. Don't want to go down to the basement as that's were all the extra furniture went.   New sheets all washed up,  new comforter....can't wait to bring him home!!

.

Have had a busy couple days for Randy.  He is still in the hospital.  Here is a time line of what has happened.

Tuesday was the pain clinic appointment and admission to hospital.
Wednesday they really didn't do much.  Just increased his morphine by 5 mg and hydrate him.  Ate 2 cans of food.

Thursday they did blood tests and an X ray.  Worked on helping clear out the plumbing. Continued to use morphine and hydrate him. Later in the day decided to switch over to Hydromorphone,  this is a synthetic morphine.   Also he has a subcutaneous IV line with a button on it to give himself a small shot of pain relief every 1/2 hour if needed.   Ate 2 cans of food.

Friday was a busy day.  They decided to do the Coeliac Plexus block to help with the pain originating from his liver pushing on a nerve.  This is done with CT guidance.  They did a mistake down in the CT Scan area and pushed some of the dye into his sub q line instead of his actual IV line.  It did cause a burning pain in his arm and some swelling at the site of the injection.  After the procedure Randy's pain level went down to 1 !!!!  First time in so long that the pain is not causing him grief.  They did find that his hemoglobin was quite low so he had 2 units of blood.  He did not sleep much Friday night.
Saturday Randy was completely worn out.  I got to hospital around noon and he slept all day.  His pain is still at 1.  Just needs to recoup from the busy week and let the new blood work.  The swelling in his arm has moved to his elbow and forearm,  there is no pain which is good.  Did not have to use the button for extra pain relief at all today as he didn't need it.  Amen, Alleluia

“The most authentic thing about us is our capacity to create, to overcome, to endure, to transform, to love and to be greater than our suffering.” — Ben Okri

It's been a couple days now that Randy has been in hospital.  First night was not very pleasant.  He felt like they did not realized he was there.  Did not sleep and did not get much help with the pain level.  Breaks my heart to hear this.  Randy was not in a good position to realize all he had to do was push the nurse call button.  I think is was the way he was admitted....which was not very organized.  usually when you get admitted you get a wrist band and then you are entered into the system. He did not get it until 11:30 the first night. Night nurse must not have been very good..:(   did not check in on him enough.  Probably thought he's not complaining so leave him be..... If I would have known how awful it was going to be I would have stayed with him all night to be there and speak for him.

We informed the doctor next morning all she can say is sorry.....hospital is not a good place to be.....don't know what happened.....I entered all the medication requirements....

Anyway enough complaining.  What's done is done.  Going forward it has been much better service.  Our day nurse, June, is very nice.  He is attentive, caring and very helpful with Randy.  The second night was better.  We again had a new nurse and he was just as helpful and nice as June.  Randy slept most of the night.

There was X-ray done on Wednesday and it was found out Randy was quite a bit blocked up in his colon.  So the first step is to clear the pipes.  His morphine has been increased by 5 mg to see if that will help.  So far there has not been much improvement.  Just makes Randy very dopey and he sleeps all day. 

Praying they can find a solution to ease his pain.  Still runs between 5 - 8 out of 10.  Randy hopes they can get it down to 3. 

The pain clinic called back yesterday afternoon and it was decided to have Randy come in for an appointment to be assessed in person by the doctor.

Our appointment was today at 12:30 and the doctor, once seeing him and talking with us,  recommended that Randy be admitted to the hospital so that they can try and get his pain under control.  He is in the Palliative Care - ICU unit at the Foothills Hospital.  Their specialty is looking after patients and making them comfortable.

It will be easier for the doctor's to try different pain medicines while in hospital where they can monitor him 24 hrs a day and see if it is working or not.  Rather than going home with a plan and calling them with updates....waiting for them to call back....having home care nurse come and unable to do anything without consulting a doctor....good grief.....

So right now were not sure how long he will be in could be 3/4 days or longer.  Just depends on how fast they can get something to work. 

Please pray for the doctor's and nurses to have the compassion and knowledge to help Randy and all those in their care at this time.

Prayer for Doctors and Nurses
O merciful Father, who have wonderfully fashioned man in your own image, and have made his body to be a temple of the Holy Spirit, sanctify, we pray you, our doctors and nurses and all those whom you have called to study and practice the arts of healing the sick and the prevention of disease and pain. Strengthen them in body and soul, and bless their work, that they may give comfort to those for whose salvation your Son became Man, lived on this earth, healed the sick, and suffered and died on the Cross. Amen.

Randy has had a couple of rough days.    He did not sleep well Saturday and Sunday as his pain spiked up to level 8.  Have been able to get it to level 6 but not lower.  Called pain clinic and now wait for them to call back.  Not sure what's going to happen next but please pray for comfort for Randy. 

I will always be by your side.

 And I will pray for you each day.

 Comfort you through all the pain,

gently kiss your fears away,

 you can turn to me and cry,

always understand that I give you all I have inside...

Randy has recovered from the procedure for the stent, just a lingering soreness in his chest from the stent expanding.   He also felt the liter of saline he rec'd on Thursday helped a lot.  It does cause him to be very tired after these outings but it was well worth it. 

He continues to be very weak and fatigued.  We are now working closely with the Pain clinic and the Home care nurse to manage his pain levels.    He has let them know that 3 out of 10 is an acceptable level for him.  The pain can spike up to 8 and usually is around 4/5.  He did try to stop the steroid last week because he felt it was not doing anything.  Found out next day that is was doing it's job because his pain increased dramatically without taking it,  needless to say he is taking it again. 

I have noticed a shift in him, Randy has accepted what is happening to him and resigned himself to what he has to go through in the future.  He has handed over the "management" of his medicines to me.  I now look after the timing and giving of all his meds.  A little stressful at first but I am slowly working out a system which includes writing everything down so I can keep it straight!  :) 

Your continued thoughts and prayers are a blessing to us as we continue on this dreadful journey where there is no happy ending. 

 

May Christ Who was crucified for your sake
free you from excruciating pain.
May Christ Who died for you
free you from the death that never ends.
May Christ the Son of the living God,
set you in the ever green loveliness of His Paradise,
and may He, the true Shepherd
recognize you as one of His own.
May you see your Redeemer face to face
and standing in His presence forever,
may you see with joyful eyes
Truth revealed in all its fullness.

Amen.

We are still working with the pain clinic and home care to try and manage Randy's pain levels.   The nurse is coming for a visit tomorrow.  Still waiting for pain clinic to call back.  Left two messages......  :(

Today was a long day again.  Had an appointment with the GI specialist to see about a stent for Randy.  While talking with him he felt it was a good idea so rather than scope him they decided to go ahead and insert the stent.  We had to wait a couple hours as a few emergencies came into the hospital and they have priority.  Randy was successfully "stented" later in the afternoon we got home at 6:30 pm.  He will be groggy and sore for a few days as the stent expands to it's full size.

He can have liquids for couple days and then start with small amounts of puréed food.  He will never be able to eat like he use to but at least will get some food intake through the mouth.  Doctor said not to eat vegetables as the tend to clog up the stent.  Randy has no problem with that!!  He will also be on acid reflux for his lifetime.  So at least a bit of positive news. 

That some good can be derived from every event is a better proposition than that everything happens for the best, which it assuredly does not. ~James K. Feibleman

Had our appointment today with the Oncologist.  It was much nicer as Randy was able to lie in a bed that is in the waiting area while we waited for our appointment.  They actually came out to Randy to do the visit there so he wouldn't have to move.

It has been decided to stop chemotherapy as Randy is too weak to carry on right now.  It is not benefiting him any to continue if he is unable to be up and walking around for at least half the day.  Also, due to the other chemo treatments not doing much of anything they feel that continuing on will not accomplish what they hoped for.

We are now going into "symptom control" mode.  Through palliative home care, the palliative pain clinic and our family doctor they will work together to manage the pain and help keep Randy comfortable for whatever time he has left.

On Tuesday we will be going to the GI Specialist at the Peter Lougheed Hospital, to see about the stent insertion.  They will scope his esophagus and if its ok they will perform the insertion at that time.  Pray it goes well.  This will greatly help Randy, if they can put the stent in as there are more choices then for pain meds...ie: he can swallow pills.

I would also like to let you know that we need to monitor the length of time for visits.  Randy gets so worn out that it takes quite a bit of time to recover.  He finally admitted it to me that he struggles with the amount and length of stay from company.  I know you all want to see him but we need to be aware of how it affects him.

So I ask that if you come to visit that your length of stay be limited to 10 - 20 minutes.  Even though you see Randy with his eyes closed he is not really sleeping.  You all have been great about texting me to see if he's up to a visit and we truly appreciate that if he's not you understand.  Love to you all!!

I want to also add that the boys and myself are so grateful to all of you who have cooked for us, given us treats and made us feel loved through your friendship.  You are all blessings in our life!!  THANK YOU so much. 

O God, who has doomed all men to die, but has concealed from all the hour of their death, grant that Randy may pass his days in the practice of holiness and justice, and that he may deserve to quit this world in the peace of a good conscience, and in the embrace of your love through the same Christ our Lord. Amen.

Quick update to let you know how Randy is doing.

He says the pain is no worse after 2.5 days of taking the steroids.  It remains the same but after eating last night he said there was not the increase in pain that usually started after an hour of eating. 

The pain clinic pharmacist talked with us today and would like Randy to continue with the steroids until Tuesday to see if he improves gradually each day.  If not we will go to plan B.  Maybe adding different nerve blockers or different narcotics.

Our deepest sympathy goes out to Aunt Shirley and family as you struggle through the grief and sadness. Please know that you are in our thoughts and prayers.
Life brings tears, smiles, and memories.
The tears dry, the smile fades,
but the memories live on forever.

With heartfelt sympathy.

Randy, Kim, Dan, Andrew and Matthew

We are home from the Pain clinic.  It was a long visit for Randy,  3 hours, but they are very nice and are going to try and get Randy feeling more comfortable.  When we first met the nurse she recognized our last name and said she remembers, from a long time ago, the name.  Found out she graduated with Randy!! 

We learned more from the pain doctor then we have from our oncologist.  He figures the pain and trouble eating Randy is having is because his stomach is squished.  The tumors that are on and around his liver cause inflammation and swelling which could double the tumor size.  This would then push on nerves and the stomach.  The first treatment, plan a, that they recommended is to hit it hard with steroids to reduce the inflammation.  He told us Randy should feel better within 3 -5 days.  We will be calling him on Thursday to let him know how it is going.  If nothing is better we will try plan b.  Not quite sure what that is yet, maybe some nerve blockers or different narcotics.  Fingers crossed this works so Randy can start to feel bit better.

Randy is also being referred to a GI specialist to talk about a stent insertion.  If it is viable, the stent would be put in to help with quality of life.  Randy would not have to spit into a cup anymore.  May or may not be able to eat solid foods.  Will be seeing him next week. 

That's all for now. 

Gracious God,
You have given us many healing remedies
that are a benefit to us when we are sick.
Through the miraculous intercession of St. Anthony,
we ask Your blessing upon the medication prescribed for
Randy
so that he may experience healing,
and be restored to full health in mind and body.

Amen.

 

It's been a bit since I updated the blog so here goes:

Randy is still suffering with lot's of abdominal pain and pain through out his body.  The only relief he gets is when he is able to find a comfortable position and fall asleep.  The nurse told us that the pain clinic should be able to help but it may take trial and error to get the right combination of medicine to work.  I am praying that they get it right quickly as it is very, very difficult to watch Randy suffer so much.  Our appointment is on Tuesday at 1:15pm at the Foothills Hospital.

He is still struggling to eat.  Was doing 2 - 3 cans a night but these past few nights he could not tolerate any as he is in so much pain.  Does manage to sip on chicken/beef broth through out the day and keep up on his water intake.

Dan's graduation banquet was this Saturday and Randy so wanted to attend but was unable to.  We surely missed having him there to celebrate this awesome accomplishment.  It suck's so bad that this disease has to ruin special moments for Randy.  We all had a good cry and allowed ourselves to work through the anger and sadness.  It was good to release these feelings which allowed Dan to have a good time.  He worked hard these past two years!!


Our next big event will be Andrew's 18th birthday and graduation in May.  My prayers are that the pain clinic doctor's will help Randy so he can attend these special moments. 

Lord Jesus Christ, by your patience in suffering you hallowed earthly pain

and gave us the example of obedience to your Father's will:

Be near me in my time of weakness and pain;

 sustain me by your grace, that my strength and courage may not fail;

 heal me according to your will; and help me always to believe that what happens to me here is of little account if you hold me in eternal life, my Lord and my God. 

Amen.

 

Things have not improved much for Randy.  The pain does not go away.  It can go from a constant ache to sharp shooting pains so to try and diminish it Randy sleeps a lot.  Our home care nurse is coming on Thursday to see what can be done.  Randy doesn't have much hope they can do anything for him but will keep trying what ever we can.  We are also having the Physiotherapist come to see him.  Maybe he can try acupuncture or massage to try to ease some of the pain.  He is willing to try anything.

We have good news,  Dan has been offered a job with Avmax Aviation Services here in Calgary.  He accepted the offer yesterday!!  This is truly a wonderful opportunity for him as be begins his career in Aviation Maintenance.  Thanks for all the added prayers.

 Thank you, Father, for having created us and given us to each other in the human family. Thank you for being with us in all our joys and sorrows, for your comfort in our sadness, your companionship in our loneliness. Thank you for yesterday, today, tomorrow and for the whole of our lives. Thank you for friends, for health and for grace. May we live this and every day conscious of all that has been given to us.

Randy started his new chemo treatment on Wednesday Apr 2.   Takes an hour now instead of three.  He did, and is still going through some of the side effects which are flu like symptoms and joint pain.  Wednesday afternoon/evening they started and continue till today.  He feels bit better today.  The fatigue is back too.  This new chemo drug is going to also, pretty certain, cause Randy to lose his hair, eyebrows and possibly his eye lashes.  He has already lost some of his hair but the doctor warned us it will all go now.  He will have 3 cycles of this new drug and then a CT scan to see if it is doing anything.

He continues to struggle with stomach/lower abdomen pain.  The morphine does not help that.  If it becomes unbearable we will call our home care nurse.  So far Randy feels he can handle it.  It's a constant annoyance for him.  We do have an appointment now with the pain clinic on April 15th.

“Heavenly Father, I thank You so much for this day. Thank You for blessing us with it and in it another opportunity to serve You. Thank You for being the light in this dark world. We thank You for the enormous blessings that You send our way. Thank You for the opportunity to serve others in Your name. 

 

I lift up all cancer patients to you. Please be with them and give them comfort and peace during this battle. They need Your care and attention. Please be with them in this journey and where it’s Your will, bring about healing to their bodies. Please be with their families as well as they join their loved ones on this journey. 

 

Amen

Our visit with the doctor today was another long day for Randy.  We talked about the CT scan that was done on March 19th.  I'm afraid it was not very good news.  The tumors have not shrunk much and the ones on the liver have increased 25%.  In talking with Dr. Tam they expect a 30 - 35% decrease in tumor size with the treatment plan Randy was on.  Randy has decided to stop the current chemo treatment of the 3 drugs and start the second line chemo treatment.  It will be one drug administered every 3 weeks thru the IV port and will start this Wednesday.  There will still be side effects for Randy but the new chemo drug, Docetaxel, is a bit easier on the body and hopefully the side effects aren't as severe.  Still hoping and praying it will either halt the tumor growth or even shrink them. 

We decided that quality of life is more important then quantity.  The 3 drug plan was knocking the S**T out of Randy so he did not have much "quality" of life.  These past two weeks have been so nice.  Randy is a bit more like his old self.  Still gets tired but at least he's a bit more awake for longer stretches of time.

Dr. Tam is also sending Randy to the Pain Clinic to see if they can help control the stomach pain better.  The morphine does not alleviate it at all.  Every time Randy hiccups its like a knife being stuck into his side.  He hiccups every time he moves positions!!

The CT scan is not needed on Wednesday and will be re-scheduled in two months time to see how the new chemo drug is doing. 

Thanks for your continued thoughts and prayers. 

O Merciful Infant Jesus!
I know of Your miraculous deeds for the sick.
How many diseases You cured during Your blessed life on earth,
and how many venerators of Your Miraculous image
ascribe to You their recovery
and deliverance from most painful and hopeless maladies.
I know, indeed, that a sinner like me
has merited his sufferings
and has no right to ask for favoUrs.
But in view of the innumerable graces
and the miraculous cures granted
even to the greatest sinners
through the veneration of Your holy infancy,
particularly in the miraculous statue of Prague
or in representations of it,
I exclaim with the greatest assurance:
O most loving Infant Jesus, full of pity,
You can cure me if You will!
Do not hesitate, O Heavenly Physician,
if it be Your will
that I recover from this present illness;
extend Your most holy hands,
and by Your power take away all pain and infirmity,
so that my recovery may be due,
not to natural remedies,
but to You alone.
If, however, You in Your inscrutable wisdom
have determined otherwise,
then at least restore my soul to perfect health,
and fill me with heavenly consolation and blessing,
that I may be like You, O Jesus,
in my sufferings,
and may glorify Your providence until,
at the death of my body,
You bestow on me eternal life.

Amen.

Since Monday Randy has started having tummy troubles again, the issue has never really been resolved.  He says its like a constant ache, he has been struggling to eat.  He did weigh himself and gained some weight back, which is great.  Our nurse, Jodi, was here on Wednesday and said to keep up with the routine that was established while in the hospital but this could be how it is as they are unsure what is causing it.  Not sure if the CT will tell them anything??  Guess we will find out Monday.

The time has flown by.  Dan will be graduating from SAIT, has started to apply for jobs and go for interviews, another one next Wednesday.   Andrew turns 18 and graduates from High School and Matthew will have successfully finished grade 10.  Seems like yesterday they were all toddlers enjoying being kids without the stresses of growing up!!

It has been 5 days since Randy was in the hospital.  He is doing a bit better.  More energy and less lightheadedness. We've talked for longer in these last 5 days then in the past few months.   The kids are happy to have him more alert.  He has been walking around the house scaring me, it's been a few months since he had the energy to do this.  Sometimes I come into the living room and he's gone somewhere.....lol    Still working on his model.  Does a little bit at a time then rests. 

The feeding is still a bit of a struggle, his bloating has become less severe but he still gets pain later during the night.  Has to stop feeding.  At least he is eating every night.  :)

He is scheduled for another CT scan on Apr 2nd to see how not having chemotherapy has affected the tumors compared to the last CT done on Wed March 19th. 

Please pray the tumors have not grown so much. 

Almighty and Eternal God,
You are the everlasting health of those who believe in You.
Hear us for Your sick servant Randy
for whom we implore the aid of Your tender mercy,
that being restored to bodily health,
he may give thanks to You in Your Church.
Through Christ our Lord.

 

Amen

Hooray!!!! Randy was able to come home yesterday afternoon.  He is feeling worlds better then he did on Monday.  The blood transfusion and extra hydration seemed to give him a boost.  Just last night you can see a difference.  He was awake more and talking more!!  He actually has started to build on a model.  He's putting tank tracks together!!!!

He was able to eat, at a slower rate, for 7 hours on Tuesday night.  Last night he was able to eat 3.5 cans of the Ensure over 13 hours!  He was a little bloaty this morning but now as bad as before. 

I want to say thanks to our Home Care nurse, Jodi, who was able to get Randy where he should be.  I feel so much better to have her on our side. 

The CT scan results were not in by the time we left so we should get them on the 31st at our scheduled appointment time.  The doctors did say from his "un-trained eye" that he did not see much difference from the last CT (from January) but not to quote him as the tumors are measured in millimeters by the technologist and then compared to the last one we won't know how much any have shrunk/grown/stayed the same until report is in. 

They are going to suspend the chemo treatments for a couple weeks to allow Randy some time to get stronger.  His new medicines to help his tummy seems to be ok.  No adverse reactions!!  Praise God.

Thanks for all your thoughts and prayers this past week.  It is wonderful to know how loved Randy is and that you all care!!

God of Love,
I thank You for the people in my life
who are easy to love.
I thank You for my family and friends
who understand my actions,
who support me in my decisions,
and whose presence can lift the burden of a thorny day.

 

Amen

Randy is still in the hospital.  They did x-rays and were negative for any blockage in his bowels and intestines.  The blood work showed that his hemoglobin's were quite low, these are the red blood cells that carry oxygen throughout the body. So he had a blood transfusion today to help bump up the count.  They put in 1 pint and we'll see if he needs more.  His color looked better after that.  Not so gray, more pink in his cheeks!!

There was a mix up with the doctor's orders last night and so Randy did not have any food.  They were not entered into the system so the nurses were unable to give him any.  He was drinking clear fluids through out the day.  Chicken and beef broth, popsicles, juice and jello plus being hydrated with a saline IV.  Just that made him feel better.

They are working on finding the correct medicine to help with the "flow" in his gut.  Gave him a new medicine that coats the stomach to try and relieve the bloating.  Hoping that helps.

He is scheduled for a CT scan tomorrow.  They are going to see if the cancer has gone elsewhere and this could be why he is bloated.  Praying not. 

Not sure how long he will be in the hospital.  He is hoping sooner rather than later.  Misses being home for sure as the beds there are not comfy at all.  I hope I can bring him home tomorrow.......fingers crossed.

“I’m here. I love you. I don’t care if you need to stay up crying all night long, I will stay with you. There’s nothing you can ever do to lose my love. I will protect you until you die, and after your death I will still protect you. I am stronger than Depression and I am braver than Loneliness and nothing will ever exhaust me.”
― Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love    

Randy continues to struggle with eating.  Yesterday he was even struggling to get water into his feeding tube.  He felt like he was going to explode because he was so bloated.  I called our nurse, Jodi, and she thought it best that Randy go to the hospital.  She was able to contact the oncologist, Dr Tam, and got Randy a direct admit to a unit at the hospital.  This was awesome!!!!we did not have to go to Emergency.

They are going to run some tests and take x-rays to try and figure out what is going on with him.  Why is he so bloated. He has lost more weight since last Monday when we had the doctor's appointment. 

Finger's crossed they can figure out what is going on and help Randy to feel better and gain some strength back.  They will be suspending his chemo treatments until he is stronger.  I will update as we know more. 

Kim

Dear Jesus, Divine Physician and Healer of the Sick, we turn to You in this time of illness. O dearest Comforter of the Troubled, alleviate our worry and sorrow with Your gentle love, and grant us the grace and strength to accept this burden. Dear God, we place our worries in Your hands. We ask that You restore Your servant to health again. Above all, grant us the grace to acknowledge Your holy will and know that whatsoever You do, You do for the love of us.
Amen.

It has been a rough week for Randy. He is still struggling to eat.  His stomach is always bloated.  The doctors plan with the new medication is not working to well.  He started with it on Saturday (3 day after chemo treatment) and every time he takes it he is very nauseous and does throw up.  He has taken the new medicines 4 times now and has decided to stop as it is so awful.  I will be phoning the nurse tomorrow to see what we can do now. 


When we were at the doctor's last Monday they really could not give a good explanation for the bloated feeling.  Could be from the chemo, could be from the cancer so the CT scan will give them some answers  see if the cancer has spread to his stomach.  I will be asking tomorrow if some other tests could be done faster because I'm not sure how much longer he can go on with this.  He is very weak and has not much strength left. 

On Friday we had palliative home care come to the house.  We now have a nurse who is there to support us in anyway we need.  Her name is Jodi and is very nice.  With this program we have access to all kinds of help.  Their main goal is to keep the patient at home for as long as possible.  I feel like we now have another advocate for us who we can reach out for help.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                  

                                                                                                                                                

What they do:

 The Palliative Care Consult Team is comprised of specially trained physicians, nurses and other health care professionals who assist patients and their families with management of complex symptom distress related to palliative needs.
Services they provide:
The Palliative Care Consult Team provides assessment and recommendations for management of complex issues related to palliative care needs, including:

• complex pain and symptom management
• psychosocial or spiritual distress for the patient or family 
• education needs of the patient or family 
• difficult end of life decision making 
• coordination of resources 
• complex discharge planning. 

The team may also be involved in assisting in the transition to an alternate setting of care (i.e. hospice, or continuing care). The team is available to provide specialized education and support to other health care providers regarding palliative care issues.

Almighty and Everlasting God, the eternal salvation of those who believe in You, hear us on behalf of Your servants who are sick, for whom we humbly beg the help of your mercy, so that, being restored to health, they may render thanks to you in your Church. Through Christ our Lord. Amen

Have finished the appointments for this week.  We had the blood work and doctor's visit on Monday at the Tom Baker Cancer Centre.

Randy was down some more in weight as he continues to struggle with eating.  The doctor has given him two new medicines to help.  One is a pill to take 1/2 before eating to help the stomach drain the food faster into the intestines.  The other is thru needles, 3 times a day, to help the "bowel mobility" as morphine and the cancer cause the bowels to stop working. 

I'll have to make a chart to keep track of all his medicines and when to take them......

It was the "big" chemo day today so Randy has decided to wait with the new medications for 3 days until he is done with all the anti-nausea drugs.  Doesn't want to do to much to his body.  Let the chemo do its thing then he can start fresh on Saturday with the new routine.

We will be going for a CT scan at the end of March to see how the new dosage of chemo is doing.  Pray for positive results so this struggle Randy is going through will be worth it!! 


May all be loved.
May all be healed.
May all be sheltered.
May all be free from fear.

May I be loved.
May I be healed.
May I be sheltered.
May I be free from fear.

Amen

May all be loved.
May all be healed.
May all be sheltered.
May all be free from fear.
My I be loved.
May I be healed.
May I be sheltered.
May I be free from fear.


Read more: http://www.beliefnet.com/columnists/chatteringmind/2007/02/prayers-that-help-with-chemo.html#ixzz2vnrIWlPn

Read more at http://www.beliefnet.com/columnists/chatteringmind/2007/02/prayers-that-help-with-chemo.html#qx14YlU2sOZGwZ33.99

May all be loved.
May all be healed.
May all be sheltered.
May all be free from fear.
My I be loved.
May I be healed.
May I be sheltered.
May I be free from fear.


Read more: http://www.beliefnet.com/columnists/chatteringmind/2007/02/prayers-that-help-with-chemo.html#ixzz2vnrIWlPn

Read more at http://www.beliefnet.com/columnists/chatteringmind/2007/02/prayers-that-help-with-chemo.html#qx14YlU2sOZGwZ33.99

May all be loved.
May all be healed.
May all be sheltered.
May all be free from fear.
My I be loved.
May I be healed.
May I be sheltered.
May I be free from fear.


Read more: http://www.beliefnet.com/columnists/chatteringmind/2007/02/prayers-that-help-with-chemo.html#ixzz2vnrIWlPn

Read more at http://www.beliefnet.com/columnists/chatteringmind/2007/02/prayers-that-help-with-chemo.html#qx14YlU2sOZGwZ33.99



Here are the group photos we took on Randy's Birthday of all who came over for a visit.



 

 

Back:  Kim, Randy, Bill, Sheila, Brad, Conor, Jennifer, Owen, Kelly, Declan, Danny

Front:  Andrew, Dan, Matthew, Allysha, Clare.



Back:  Tim, Randy, Kim, Glen, Jeff, Kyle, Shelly

Front:  Rhonda Matthew, Andrew, Dan, Jaret.

Well our appointments for this week are done.  Randy still is not doing well.  Very weak.  He has no energy or muscle strength.  Walking out to the car takes all his effort.  Please pray for strength for him.  He continues to struggle to eat.  Some nights he can other's he can't.  I worry about this because as a mom we are always making sure everyone has eaten.  Hard not to push him.  His swallowing still has not gotten much better. 

We have out doctor's appointment on Monday March 10th.  This also includes blood work at the hospital.  So another long day for Randy.  Have to go to lab 1.5 hours before the appointment.  This is not enough time to come home so it's sitting around at the hospital waiting.   :(

We celebrated Randy's 48th birthday this past weekend in the FREEZING cold.  Jeff, Shelly, Kyle & Jaret Pawelko, Tim & Rhonda Frizzell and Glen Puschner came over Friday evening.  Had dinner and nice visit with them all.  Thanks for "cooking" you guys.

Mom & Dad Orr, Brad, Jennifer, Clare & Conor Orr, Danny, Kelly, Allysha, Declan & Owen Marshall came over Saturday afternoon.  Had lunch and a nice visit with them all.  Thanks for the meat/cheese platter Jennifer.  Thanks to all of you for braving the cold to come out and visit with us.

Randy handled all the company like a trooper.  Was worn out on Sunday so we had a "Pirates of the Caribbean" movie marathon.  Hunkered down nice and warm on the couch!!

I want to say a big "Thank you" to Glen's mom, Hilda Puschner.  She has been cooking our meals every Wednesday for the last month or so to help us out.  She lost her husband to cancer and knows what we're going through and wants to offer what help she can.  Wednesday's are chemo days so this helps a lot plus she is a very good cook.  Her meals are delicious and always includes a desert, for the sweet tooth I have.....lol...

Hoping this finds you all well.  Thanks for praying for us.

“The sun shall always rise upon a new day and there shall always be a rose garden within me. Yes, there is a part of me that is broken, but my broken soil gives way to my wild roses.”
― C. JoyBell C.

Randy: 

You are an amazing person and the best friend of mine. May God give you all his love and warmth in every step of yours. Wishing you a very Happy Birthday! Love you!

 

 

I was able to speak to the nurse and we made a plan to help Randy.  It worked and he has been feeling a tiny bit better.   The past 3 nights he has been able to eat a little.  2 cans then 2.5 cans and then 3 cans.  Still feels bloated in the morning but at least he's getting some nutrients.

When we were at the hospital on Wednesday for the bottle change Randy's blood pressure was low.  As we talked with nurse I told her he had not been having enough fluids and asked if they could hang a bag of saline.  They got the ok from the doctor so he had a bag to help hydrate him.  Said he felt better after that.  While we were there Randy was drinking some Ginger Ale.  On the ride home his tummy was suddenly not good.  Probably shouldn't have drunk the Ginger Ale, to fizzy.....

Good new he is able to take 3 sips of juice all at once compared to the 1 small sip he was able to last week.  He so wants to be able to have a glass of water he can "gulp" down.  Small steps are very encouraging.

He has been feeling a bit down this past week.  So tired of the pain and not feeling well.  Would like one day where he feels normal.  If we could add this to the prayers you are all saying that would be great.


Gentle Jesus, who cured the sick and laid a healing hand upon the lame, the blind and the handicapped, look with compassion upon me in my suffering. If it is not your Will to cure me, then give me strength to bear my burden and offer it up to You. You suffered so much for me. Give me grace to offer my sufferings in union with Your own, in reparation for my sins and those of others, for the needs of this troubled world, and for the release of the souls in purgatory. Mary, compassionate Mother, pray for your weary child. Health of the Sick, Comforter of the Afflicted, pray for me. Amen.

It has been a rough few days for Randy.  His stomach has not been cooperating and is still very crampy and full feeling (bloated).  Has not eaten the last few days as even having water causes pain and cramps.  The kids and I are worried and struggle because there is nothing we can do to help him.

A wonderful thing happened today...... our family doctor, Dr Bhatla, stopped by the house to see Randy.  We discussed what was happening and he helped us figure out why this is happening.  The regime the oncologist has him on is good but the Lactulose and Lax-a-day are not quite what he needs as the are just "softeners".  The Doctor explained how your stomach, when normal, fluctuates when digesting food and pushes it on its way to the intestines and such.  Morphine stops this action, causing your stomach and intestines to be still  He suggested talking to the nurse/oncologist about using a laxative that "stimulates mobility" in the gut.  So first thing in the morning I will call the nurse to ask for suggestions to use.  Dr. Bhatla wanted us to check first with them as he does not want to interfere with the chemotherapy and they would know best what to use. 


Randy continues to have no energy and spends most of the day sleeping.  He has lost his strength and struggles with stairs and getting out to the car.  We are hoping that once we get his stomach settled he will start eating again and build up his strength.

The only courage that matters is the kind that gets you from one moment to the next.  ~Mignon McLaughlin

Our prayers have been working!!!  Today's doctor visit was good. The results from the CT scan were positive.  Some of the tumors have shrunk and some have stayed the same and just a few have grown.  The original tumor in his esophagus has shrunk by 1.2 mm.  YEAH!!!  Bit of a mixed bag but the doctor was pleased with the results and Randy will continue with his chemo treatments.  He was only at 70% dosage so they are going to increase it by 10% as Randy is handling it well.  This will start tomorrow.  Our appointment is at 8:45 am.  Please say a prayer at that time to ask for the chemo to do it's job. 

The blood clots that were in his lungs have disappeared and the ones in his leg and lower abdomen are still there but not moved or grown.  His body will eventually take care of them. 

Has lost some more weight since last visit due to his eating issues but slowly he is starting to eat again, which should help him gain a bit back.  Last few nights he has been able to have 3 cans.  GO RANDY GO!!! 

Love to all.

                               'Lord,

                                I love you and I need you,

                                come into my heart, and bless me,

                                my family, my home, and my friends,

                                in Jesus' name.

                                Amen.'